Wrap up

Alex// Sunrise @ Daewangam Park

I'm starting this blog three months prior to actually leaving Korea, in anticipation of having difficulty reflecting on my time here during the madness of my last few months.

Two years. Two years this has been my home. I've been thinking back to my first few months here, when I was in my nesting mode. Exploring my neighborhood, transforming my apartment into a place that I looked forward to returning to at the end of the day, catching up (or slowing down) to the pace of life. The life I created for myself here has been on one hell of a roller coaster. What I was doing during my first few months looks a lot different compared to what I am doing now. Ramen and gimbap are no longer a staple of my diet. My focus has drifted from accumulating objects to figuring out how to get rid of all my possessions. Wine and art nights have now just become art nights. Instead of rushing home after work, I rush to the gym.

When I walk down my street, I do so with a sense of pre-nostalgia. I'm viewing present moments with future feelings of loss. Soon, I will be overwhelmed with "lasts". The last time walking to work. My last class. The last time eating at my favorite gimbap restaurant. The last time purchasing flowers from the sweet lady on the corner. The list of ends is endless.

But what do endings bring, if not beginnings? It's hard trying to balance my appreciation for all that I am leaving behind and everything I have coming. One day I am asking myself if I am really ready to end this chapter, and the other I am begging time to move faster so I can get on with my plans. I've experienced this transitional phase a few times in the course of my life. I don't think it has gotten any easier to stay present when the "now" and the "future" are playing a competitive game of tug-o-war with my thoughts.

Things I'm gonna miss
-Ajummas speaking to me and having no idea what they are saying. Watching them laugh as a wave of confusion washes over my face, followed by us both giggling and shrugging our shoulders in defeat.

-Feeling really confident asking a question in Korean, only to realize I have no idea how to translate their response.

-My students, even the ones that make me want to pull my hair out.

-My apartment, and living near the sea. This is the first place I have been able to call entirely my own. Living alone and creating my own space has been such a treat.

View from my apartment

-Food. All of it.

-The families that I have been lucky enough to become a part of. I've had the chance to watch the kids I babysit for grow up, the boys into curious pre-schoolers and the girls into fun toddlers that never fail to brighten my day. Their moms have become like sisters to me, and I'm lucky enough to have the chance to take solace in the comfort of "family" when mine is so far away. 

- Jimjilbangs, and being completely comfortable walking around butt naked. Hopping between the scorching hot and ice cold baths, mixed in with a few sessions in the saunas. I wish I would have taken advantage of these magical places more often... but I refused to visit the one near my house in fear of seeing one of my students. THAT I would not be comfortable with.

- The incredible people that I teach with, and get to see nearly everyday. I am so lucky to work with people that I genuinely enjoy being around. My Korean coworkers have been so dang helpful since the beginning. I never hesitate to ask them for help, which they are always happy to give me.

-Cheap taxis, which sometimes double as the entertainment for the evening.

-Norebangs, and their unbeatable collection of old, cheesy English songs.

Things I am not going to miss
-Trash

-Being a part of an educational system that I disagree with. I often have a heavy heart at work, knowing that most of my students are stressed and tired. Some of them haven't eaten dinner, and won't have a chance to before they go to their next academy. Some of them study for 12 hours a day. They study when they are on vacation at school. They study on the weekends. Their little lives are focused on passing tests and memorizing useless facts. I have constantly wished there was something more that I could do. Something more than trying to shift the focus of our classes from "studying" to "talking". I hope I was able to help my students relax and take a breath.

- The frequency that I see dead animals for sale. Don't get me wrong, I find it completely fascinating. Roaming around markets is one of my favorite past times, and they are always presenting me with something new. I've never really been exposed to markets like this growing up, so they are one of the things that makes me realize where I am. However, seeing and smelling it every day isn't pleasant. And the condition that they keep some of those fishies in makes me uncomfortable as well.

I've probably said it a million times, but I am so grateful that I've been given the opportunity to experience Korea on such a deep, captivating level. I tried to be as present and aware as I could. I think this helped me come to somewhat of an understanding of what, and who Korea is. In the process of learning about another country, I've learned more about myself. I've gone through cycles, in and out of good habits. One thing I can say for sure, is that I'll be leaving Korea as the best version of me to date. It took a few downs to really catapult me into a deeper sense of self, and of this beautiful world around me. 

ShangHai

I rarely expect anything when it comes time to travel to a new place. It doesn't do any good, because things don't often live up to an idea that you create in your head.

Our sweet hostel's rooftop bar

There are times, however, when I don't expect things. China is a prime example. Here I am, having lived in Korea for over a year, thinking that I won't be the least bit culture shocked. Oh, it's Asia. How different can China really be from Korea? REALLY DIFFERENT. And that's just after seeing Shanghai, a city in China that's renowned for being an international, "modern" city. I don't even know if I can describe the sensation of walking down the streets that first afternoon.

I often found myself missing things about Korea. The food. The people. The language. I realized that I can communicate in Korean better than I give myself credit. I felt helpless, and a touch of rude, not being able to say anything other than "hello" and "thank you". I missed being able to read, especially menus. Coming to Shanghai reminded me how much I love Korea. However, it also reminded me how much I love traveling to new places which leave me in a perpetual state of "wow".

For a while, I never really considered going to China. It didn't interest me as much as places like Japan, Mongolia, and pretty much every SEAsian country. I booked tickets because I thought some friends would be there around that time, and only because after delving into a bit of research about Shanghai I decided it seemed pretty cool.

Traveling with people is tricky. One person. Ten people. I'm lucky to have been with a group that made this easy. Easier than usual. Everyone was easy going. Easy to please. I supposed because it was my idea to go to Shanghai that I was inadvertently placed into the "leader" position. I knew where I wanted to go and the things that I wanted to do, and that's what we did. It was hard for me to not be concerned about my friends state of being. Were they enjoying my game plan? Luckily, I think we all felt that we covered pretty much all the base, especially considering the amount of time we had.

The first evening, three of us (awaiting the arrival of the other two) set out to find a noodle joint that I saw on one of Bourdain's shows. I did an immaculate job of getting us to the AREA, but failed miserably at actually finding it. Good thing it's all about the journey, right? On our way we walked through an array of streets. The most memorable would be the mini pet market we wandered through. Bunnies. Squirrels. Loud, huge insects. In the tiniest little boxes. It was interesting and weird and so, so sad. Meygan and Leena watched as ducks were decapitated on the side of the street, while I choose the more pleasant option of cooing at a sweet dog chained up across the way.





We were hungry. There were countless food shops lined up along the street. We had no idea how to pick. And then, like a sign from above, we walked past a group of elderly Chinese men slurping up some beautiful looking noodles. We gawked while walking past. About 3 meters later, we all stopped and decided we needed the noodles. And we needed them now. We pointed, held up one finger to signify we wanted an order of whatever that was, and sat down at a tiny table on the side of the street that was already occupied by another patron awaiting his meal.  After unknown hand signals and words were exchanged between us and the little woman taking our order, we were lacking in confidence about what was going to actually end up on our table. We waited, and waited some more. While we waited, the couple sitting next to us was delivered a delicious plate of noodles that looked like chow mein. So we pointed and ordered some of that, too.  Finally, we got the noodles. We slurped, and in between every slurp we couldn't help but to express our delight (usually in the form of "ummmms" and "omgs"). We walked away wishing we had ordered a bowl each.

This was the first meal we had. We had no idea what we were eating. Every meal that was to follow, as delicious as they were, did not live up to this meal. Was it in part due to the experience that surround the actual acquisition of the noodles? Maybe. After that night, our beautiful Korean friend, Seolwi (who happens to be fluent in Mandarin), did all the ordering for us. I am forever grateful to her and her incredible language abilities. She helped me from constantly feeling like a lost, hungry puppy.

So, anyways. The first night we headed to The Bund to check out the view. We had to find a secret password to get into an overpriced club that had a bird's eye view of the famous skyline. We bought one drink while we enjoyed people and building watching. They turned the lights off all the buildings at 11pm. That was our cue that we needed a change of scenery. A scenery that included more food.

There were a few mornings where I woke up WAY before anyone else did. One morning in particular I woke up as others were just arriving to the hostel *cough* Leena and Jake. I took this as a prime opportunity to get some solo exploration in. I went and wandered around a park that was near the hostel. I watched old people do Tai Chi and practice their sword skills. I enjoyed the fresh morning air and brought back coffee for everyone.














The other morning I took a look at the map on my phone which had loads of places I wanted to go bookmarked. I had a place starred that was pretty far off, but that's what subways are for. I thought it was a cemetery, turns out it was more of a memorial park. All fine though. I got to watch more old people doing strange things with fans and swords. There we hundreds of elderly in the park, doing ballroom dancing and more Tai Chi and things that I have never seen before. I settled down in an area of the park that was covered in trees. It was a prime viewing area. People on my right were doing Tai Chi with music. Behind me were three men stomping around in black robes. To my left there were friendly games of badminton, and in front of me was a huge, pyramid like memorial surrounded by massive statues.

I was seated next to an elderly man's pile of equipment. He attempted to strike up conversation with me, no English included. I somehow understood the first question he asked me, which was something along the lines of, "Where are you from?" I told him one of the few words I know in Chinese, which happens to be America. He must of assumed that I had a better grasp of the language than I actually did, because he proceeded to have a full on conversation with me while I nodded and repeated things that he said every now and then. There were hand signals and drawings in the dirt. Was he trying to tell me about the Chinese harvest holiday, or was he trying to ask me how old I was? I will never know.

The conversation ended with him asking me to play badminton with him. I politely declined and pointed to my eyes to try and communicate that I would watch him instead. After a few rounds with his friend, he asked again. I decided not to pass up the opportunity a second time. He tried his very best to teach me how to hit that damn birdie, and despite a few success, I was an overall failure at badminton. We got some good laughs out of the situation, at least. He must have frequented the park, because his friends would walk past pointing at me with a confused face while asking him what the hell he was doing. Then, they all wanted a turn at playing with the silly white girl. By the end of our 30 minute badminton session, I was pooped. I reluctantly waved goodbye to my new friend and thanked him, with hopes that he understood. I checked my clock, and it was barley 8:45am.  It was so much fun, hands down the highlight of the entire trip.

One thing I really wanted to do was to visit an ancient water village outside of Shanghai. We got a late start, but eventually made it on the last boat with no time to spare. The ride was short and sweet (which was good for everyone else, considering they had mild food poisoning). Zhujiajiao was so cute, and a huge change from the city vibes of Shanghai. It felt like we were catapulted back into ancient China. An ancient China that was filled with souvenir shops and skwaking  plastic chickens. However, the buildings and boats and people had a much more traditional vibe than Shanghai. I'm happy to have had some contrast in our trip. 

Our last day was plagued with rain. Rivers running down the streets (and in my shoes) kind of rain. It wasn't ideal, but it did ingrain some priceless memories into our brains. The savior of the rain stricken day lay in the hands of the Xiaolongbao (soup dumplings) we ate on our last night, thanks to Mister BOURDAIN. My phone auto corrects his name to all caps, so I'm gonna leave that as is. We sucked down as many fluffy soup pillows as we could before heading to a wine bar to watch as the rain poured down around us. It was an unexpected perfect end to our adventure. 

After scratching the surface of China, I wanna dig deeper. I've altered my tentative travel plans for next year, when my contract is finished. I'm considering hitting up the Trans-Siberian Railway, starting at the eastern most point of Russia, traveling through Mongolia, and then ending up exploring some of Northern China. I really don't like leaving my experience of one country comprised of one place. The thought of how damn big China is, and how little of it that I've seen bothers me. So, with my 10 year visa, I plan on fixing that.

blink

My trip home felt like I blinked, and it was all over. Like a wrinkle in time. A small break from one of my realities to remember I have a whole life back home. Just, waiting for me to come back to it. Two, completely separate realities. My friends here don't know where I come from, and my friends and family back home can't even begin to conceptualize what my life is like here.

I was so enthralled with being home, I was hardly on my phone. I failed at taking pictures and at communicating with people. I was sad to arrive back to Korea with few accounts of my trip, but the documentation I do have will suffice.

I didn't do as much as I wanted, or have the chance to see everyone that I wanted. But, I think I ended up doing all the things that really mattered in the end. 

I gorged myself with food from Whole Foods.

I did Bikram Yoga and ate at Raw Cafe, in my one attempt to keep my gluttony under control.

I was lazy with my sister and the pups.

I hung out downtown and surprised people with my presence.

I had a small gathering at my house with friends, which resulted in a late night Roberto's delivery.

I road tripped with my mom to see my brother in Utah. We watched shitty reality TV and went on an incredible hike in the morning. We played Scattegories and ate sandwiches.

My sister and I made our way up to my cabin. My favorite place in the world. It was a short trip. Less than 24 hours. But, that didn't matter. I was just happy as hell to be there. In the woods. At the meadow. Taking in the fresh air and re-exploring a place that was a big part of my childhood. A big part of adulthood too.


I shopped and ate and shopped and ate. And spent time by the pool. And shared cuddles with my dogs.

I appreciated my chance to visit home. I wish I could have stayed for longer. It helped me put a lot of things into perspective. I have a better idea of how I want the next few years of my life to pan out. I want to spend more time in Vegas than I previously considered. I am so lucky to have so many amazing people at "home". Not all are quite as lucky as me.

Watch me whip, now watch me Namhae

When I first decided I was going to move to Korea, I was leaning hard towards a public school job. I was researching the different provinces I could work for and easily narrowed my search down to the south. The first application I sent would have landed me a job smack dab in the middle of this beautiful little island. There wasn't much about it on the Internet, other than it being a hidden treasure of Korea. Decades behind the overdeveloped, high rise cities scattered throughout the rest of he country. I had to decided between working in a place this this, where I would likely be the only foreigner, and working in a bigger city where I would have more of a community. Things worked out in favor of the latter. Regardless, there was a good month of my life that I spent imagining what it would be like living there. I was in love with the idea of it. 

I was so happy when I was finally able to visit the place that I had spent so much time thinking about. A weekend filled with activities and camping and the beach, surround by my favorite people. It has been one of my favorite events of this year thus far. From being featured on a big screen while eating carne aside (and pretending to eat carne asada), riding around on lawn chair peddle boats, beach bonfires, temples, kayaks, banana boats, and makin new friends from all over Korea - the memories are endless. Instead of taking account of all the details, I'll just leave these pictures here. Hopefully they will do this island justice.